TheIsleofMan.Net Interview: 'Tamara Lunardo from TamaraOutLoud.com'

Tamara Lunardo blogs about her thoughts on life and faith at Tamara Out Loud. Her writing is inspirational, vulnerable and, when she puts her mind to it, it's humorous as well. She also is a part-time freelance editor and writer, is often syndicated at BlogHer and contributes monthly at A Deeper Story. Last, but not even close to least, she is the mother of five children. She's practically a superhero. 

Tamara was kind enough to take some time out of her busy schedule to answer a few of my questions. We talked about "girl-versus-girl" cagefighting, tattoos and Christianity. She was a great sport.

Check out the interview after the jump!

A Few Questions with 'Tamara Out Loud's' Tamara Lunardo

Kevin Haggerty: First off, thanks for your time and doing this interview. You're good people. I mean that. 

Tamara Lunardo: You're quite welcome. Thanks for playing the 12 Gifts of Christmas. You could just as easily be sitting there with the Hot Stuff sign right now instead, which your wife might find awkwardly inappropriate. So thanks for taking a risk on me.

KH: Ha. Indeed. I live on the edge.

I asked the "fans" if they had anything they wanted me to ask you. I had a few suggestions, so we'll get to those first.

First "fan question:" Are you currently contemplating any new tattoos? If so, what and where?

TL: I am always contemplating new tattoos. The large piece on my shoulder represents my children; I'd like another large one to represent my heritage, but it's a question of real estate at this point. I really wanted it to be a quarter sleeve, but I'm a little terrified of what my triceps might look like in 20 years; I'm not sure I'll want to call attention to them. So maybe on my ribs. I don't envision a whole lot of torso exposure in my elder years.

KH: Second fan question. You write a blog that inspires people. Who do you read on a regular basis? What inspires you? 

TL: Well first of all, thanks; that's gracious of you to say. I love to read Anne Lamott, C.S. Lewis, and David Sedaris, and I think there's something in each of their voices, styles, and perspectives that has helped shape mine.

But I think what most inspires my writing is really living life. It's when I'm involved and paying attention that I find the best stories and perspective. That sounds obvious, but I think that bloggers -- myself most especially included -- have a tendency to attach themselves to their screens and look for a blog post. But the best stories are always found off-screen; the medium can never really be the inspiration.

KH: Last fan question. Who would win in a cage match between you and Leanne Shirtliffe? Feel free to explain your answer in vivid detail.

TL: The audience.

KH: Sort've a cop out, but we'll let you off the hook. :)

You're a wife and the mother of five children. How do you balance all of that with your writing? What's the most challenging part of that "juggling" act?

TL: I balance it poorly. My kids would say I write too often; I say I don't do it enough. The biggest challenge for me is avoiding the unnecessary time sucks. I think if I were better about that, my kids would feel I had more time for them and I'd feel I had more time for my writing. I know there are people who do far more with their daily 24 hours than I do, and it just dumbfounds me. I am time-managementally challenged. 

KH: What made you want to be a writer in the first place? At what point in your life did you have this revelation?

TL: I didn't ever want to "be a writer" so much as I was always a person who wrote. My mom says that when I was very little, long before I learned the joy of sentence structure, I would just write page after page, with no break between words. You kind of had to know what you were doing to decipher it. But I think that's a pretty good illustration -- I still just need to pour out words. Except now I use spaces. And also, now I do want to "be a writer," and it's been blogging that's made me realize that.

KH: What advice would you give to a new blogger who is working on developing an audience and finding their "tribe?"

TL: A lot of the advice on developing an audience that I see is very formulaic or vague or, worse, both. It must work for some people or I wouldn't see it ad nauseum. But the idea of pandering to build an audience grosses me out, so my advice is always to work at developing your craft, not your audience. I began writing a blog that 20 people read on a good day. I didn't follow formulas, I didn't swirl vague notions in my head -- I wrote. And then I wrote more. I wrote well. And then I wrote better. And as I worked on developing my craft, an audience developed along with it. And now only 20 people visiting my blog would be a bad day, except that you can never call it a bad day when anyone is willing to show up for you.

Which brings me to the finding of your "tribe." You cannot write in a vacuum. If you do, guaranteed you will either mistake your work for absolute crap or absolute genius. You need people to bounce ideas off of, to learn from, to be inspired by; people who will encourage you and be frank with you. This has never been easier to come by than it is in the blogging world. If you read and comment on other blogs, you'll soon find groups of people with whom you fit. Connect with them on Twitter -- talk with them, retweet links to their posts that you enjoy. And before you know it, you and your tribe will be helping each other develop your audiences too.

KH: What's the most rewarding part of blogging? What's the most frustrating part?

TL: The instant feedback. And the instant feedback. It's a great feeling when I see people enjoying or being moved by or just really getting my writing. And it's a terrible feeling when I see people taking my writing the wrong way.

KH: At what point did you know that you weren't just blogging as a hobby anymore? If you could pinpoint one moment in your life where you knew this was now your career and it was "for real," what would that be?

TL: The smartass in me wants to say, "When I got my first BlogHer paycheck." But honestly, it was when I began getting emails from readers. When people were affected enough by what I was doing to break that little wall, it let me know that I wasn't just publishing posts for my own sake anymore. It was humbling. And pretty cool.

KH: A new viewer, spending several minutes on your site, would probably first pick up on the fact that you are a Christian, you curse and profess a propensity for "adult language." Why is that something you're so upfront about? Is that a "weed-out" mechanism?

TL: I am a Christian; as it happens, swear words are a non-issue for me. In fact, I am a proponent of always using the best word, even when it's a "bad word." Some people don't get that, and I began to receive comments and emails and corrections and questions to such an extent that I became tired of handling them. So I created my Be Warned page as a simple, up-front way to say, "This is the way things go at my place. You're welcome to stay, and you're free to leave." Most people stay, and we have a great time.

KH: From what I've seen, it seems like your audience is equal parts "Protestant Christian" and equal parts "Other." Was that something you were aiming for? Was it intentional or did it just happen that way?

TL: I think it may be a little heavier on the "Protestant Christian" side, but you're right that I have a diverse readership. I think it happened that way naturally because of what I write about and how I approach it; which is to say, just about everyone appreciates a thoughtful poem one day and a dirty joke the next.

KH: As often as you write and put yourself out there, I'm sure you must have to deal with the occasional cyber-dummy who gets on and blasts you or criticizes you unfairly. How do you deal with those kinds of people and situations?

TL: I think that because I'm very open on my blog, people think they can talk to me however they please. But the truth is I'm very sensitive. When I get those kinds of blasts, it hurts; it's hard. So, first, I feel sorry for myself, then I run to my husband, and sometimes I even tattle to my loyal readers, who immediately jump to my defense. It's very immature, but it works for me.

KH: What's the best advice you have ever received, as a writer?

TL: One time when I was feeling bad about the kind of harsh comment we just talked about, my friend Jenny told me that I couldn't worry about the chorus; she said, "You, my dear, were called to a solo." And ever since, I've been emboldened to continue writing with my own voice.

KH: How much time, during a standard day, do you spend on the internet?

TL: Way too frickin' much -- I have a little bit of an internet addiction. It's not my most endearing quality.

KH: For you, what was the most fascinating story of 2011? Why?

TL: The story of Julio Diaz taking the teenager who robbed him at knife-point out to dinner. Because that's what it means to live like Christ.

KH: In a quote I'm sure you are familiar with, Mahatma Ghandi once said: "“I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. They are so unlike your Christ.” React to that.

TL: I actually reacted to that pretty strongly a few years ago. You can read about it here.

KH: What are five things you'd like to accomplish, personally, before this time next year?

TL: 

1. I'm going to cheat and put down something that's already set to happen: Publish the book I'm editing, What a Woman is Worth, due out this summer through Civitas Press.
2. Submit a proposal for a book of my own essays.
3. Spend less time on the dang internet and more time with my beautiful family.
4. Record a full set of songs with my worship team/friends known affectionately as the "Transitional Spiders."
5. Write like a kid who loves it so much, she doesn't have time for spaces.

KH: Tamara, I appreciate your time and thank you for your candid answers. Best wishes to you and I hope you enjoy your holiday season with your family!

TL: Thanks for having me here, Kevin. Have a wonderful New Year!


Special thanks again to Tamara for spending time with us and sharing her thoughts. Check out her website, early and often, at www.tamaraoutloud.com.






Enjoy the interview? Responses are appreciated!