Whether you cared to know or not, you've probably found out about reality television star Kim Kardashian's recent divorce from NBA basketball player Kris Humphries.
In a statement on her personal website, she posted the following:
"It just didn’t turn out to be the fairy tale I had so badly hoped for."Hearing about her divorce and her subsequent response causes me to go through a gamut of emotions. It makes me sad, because divorce is always sad. It amuses me that there are people that shallow and "lacking of depth" (and famous for absolutely no reason) in the world. It makes me angry for a multitude of reasons.
But it's not all for naught. There's always a lesson. In every defeat, there are victories.
You can learn a lot from a Kardashian.
It's hard to say exactly what Kim Kardashian thought her marriage was going to be. Whatever that fantasy was, apparently, it's not the first time she's suffered such a misconception.
She was married before. It was a brief union, even briefer than this last one. It happened when she was eighteen. If you hear her talk about it, you might think she was referring to a lower back tattoo that she ended up having removed.
No big deal.
The saddest part of this whole "episode" isn't what she said in her response. It's that a lot of people identified with her. They may even agree with and support her in her feelings.
I anticipate a rather ambivalent reaction from society. Maybe I'm being unfair or overly pessimistic (wouldn't be the first time), but I think there are a lot of people that will say: "You go girl! Keep trying! You'll find that fairy tale romance eventually!"
(Sidebar: I'm pretty sure no one says, "You go girl!" anymore. I'm exaggerating the extent to which I am white and out of touch with popular culture. It's funny. Get it?)
The problem is that the fairy tale isn't real. There's no prince or princess. Marriage isn't a fairy tale and it doesn't have a storybook ending.
Marriage is hard work.
I know. I've been married a little more than two years now. I'm an expert.
In all seriousness, I know I have a TON to learn about marriage and being a husband. But I do know this: Both require a commitment to learn, sacrifice and humble myself.
My wife does things that irritate me. I'm one hundred percent confident that I do far more things that irritate her. In truth, she should be sainted while still living for having to put up with me.
It isn't romantic. It isn't a kiss that wakes up a "Sleeping Beauty." A large part of marriage consists of putting up with your spouse.
And that is why the divorce rate is so high. That's why we have an ever-growing number of broken homes. Men and women are going into marriage with unrealistic expectations of how things will and should be.
There's no "easy button." It'd be great if there was. But the truth is that that is one of the things that makes marriage beautiful.
Thomas Paine once said: "That which we obtain too easily, we esteem too lightly."
The opposite is also true. You don't value things you don't work hard for. As a teacher, I constantly see kids who drive these nice, brand new cars that were given to them by their parents. They don't properly value them. How could they? They didn't earn it. It wasn't the result of hard work. If it goes away, they will probably just get another one.
We see it in sports too. NFL and NBA coaches are given far less rope than they were in years past. What have you done for me lately? If you're not winning, it's time for a change. It's a direct reflection of society.
Your marriage isn't always going to be successful. You will frustrate each other. You will misunderstand each other. You will have doubts.
Work at your marriage. You'll be glad you did.
What do you think? Are we raising a generation of "quitters?" Does marriage mean what it used to? When were some times you've felt like giving up but chose to keep going?
The saddest part of this whole "episode" isn't what she said in her response. It's that a lot of people identified with her. They may even agree with and support her in her feelings.
I anticipate a rather ambivalent reaction from society. Maybe I'm being unfair or overly pessimistic (wouldn't be the first time), but I think there are a lot of people that will say: "You go girl! Keep trying! You'll find that fairy tale romance eventually!"
(Sidebar: I'm pretty sure no one says, "You go girl!" anymore. I'm exaggerating the extent to which I am white and out of touch with popular culture. It's funny. Get it?)
The problem is that the fairy tale isn't real. There's no prince or princess. Marriage isn't a fairy tale and it doesn't have a storybook ending.
Marriage is hard work.
I know. I've been married a little more than two years now. I'm an expert.
In all seriousness, I know I have a TON to learn about marriage and being a husband. But I do know this: Both require a commitment to learn, sacrifice and humble myself.
My wife does things that irritate me. I'm one hundred percent confident that I do far more things that irritate her. In truth, she should be sainted while still living for having to put up with me.
It isn't romantic. It isn't a kiss that wakes up a "Sleeping Beauty." A large part of marriage consists of putting up with your spouse.
And that is why the divorce rate is so high. That's why we have an ever-growing number of broken homes. Men and women are going into marriage with unrealistic expectations of how things will and should be.
There's no "easy button." It'd be great if there was. But the truth is that that is one of the things that makes marriage beautiful.
Thomas Paine once said: "That which we obtain too easily, we esteem too lightly."
The opposite is also true. You don't value things you don't work hard for. As a teacher, I constantly see kids who drive these nice, brand new cars that were given to them by their parents. They don't properly value them. How could they? They didn't earn it. It wasn't the result of hard work. If it goes away, they will probably just get another one.
We see it in sports too. NFL and NBA coaches are given far less rope than they were in years past. What have you done for me lately? If you're not winning, it's time for a change. It's a direct reflection of society.
Your marriage isn't always going to be successful. You will frustrate each other. You will misunderstand each other. You will have doubts.
Work at your marriage. You'll be glad you did.
What do you think? Are we raising a generation of "quitters?" Does marriage mean what it used to? When were some times you've felt like giving up but chose to keep going?
