Getting Back on the Horse -- Plus an Update

Doing anything consistently is hard. Blogging isn't any different.

It requires a discipline -- an attention to detail. And it very easily gets shoved violently to the bottom of the "to do list."

When life gets busy, it's difficult to justify taking a few minutes to write. It feels irresponsible, sometimes, almost like I'm chasing a fantasy fairytale when I should be taking out the trash or some other chore on the list.

Then, when I finally do get myself to a mental place where I'm ready to write, my head spins with all these menial boxes to check that don't really matter all that much.

Is this a post that will stir up a response and get a decent amount of comments?

Will this post have a headline that garners successful SEO stats?

Am I writing from a pure place, or am I writing just to write?

And what I find is, if I have those conversations and let those questions be serious boundaries around the foundation of my writing...

...I don't write.

Ever.

This past week has been that way. I have weeks where I write four or five posts in a row. I feel passionate about them. I get a great response. People share them on Facebook and Twitter. I feel like I'm really writing like a pro.

But then I get hit with a setback. I feel like I can't live up to the week before. I feel tapped out creatively. I've got nothing.

At the end of the day, I believe it's okay to "write just to write." Writing is an exercise, and if you only exercise that creative part of your brain when you have a beautiful, mind-rending epiphany, you just won't write regularly enough to be worth a crap as a writer.

So, I'm trying to be better about that, and I'm sharing my frustrations with you guys, so that we can hold each other accountable.

I also wanted to update you on what's been going on in my life.

God has been good to us. Really, really good. I currently have more graphic work than I can even keep up with. It's a good problem to have, but it presents a set of problems I've never had to deal with before. I'm adjusting, and I'm just grateful that the tides are beginning to turn.

In addition to my freelance work through KR Graphix, I also was recently hired by my church to serve as "Head of Communications," which essentially just means I'm their lead graphic designer. It's great, and it provides a little more money to help towards the monthly totals.

So, life is good. It's just really hectic right now. I'm going to really try to keep writing regularly, and I'm sorry that I neglected the blog this week.

As always, I don't want this to be a one-way street. Whether you're a writer or not, please share in the comment section below how things are going for you right now. What's new? Can we pray for you specifically in any particular way?

Bring it.

Before You Thrive, You Have to Survive

When I was in High School, my friends and I used to play a game called "Flicks."

It was dumb. Really, really dumb.

The object of the game was to hold your hands together, fingers outstretched, and allow your opponent to flick you anywhere on either one of your hands, and vice versa. They flicked you. You flicked them.

So on and so forth -- until someone gave up.

I was the best.

It wasn't because I flicked the hardest. According to the other guys, I didn't even flick that hard (though, by the end of the year, that changed too). No, it was a lot less about the damage I inflicted, and more about my defense.

The game was psychological to a large extent. Whenever I played, I made it a goal of mine to never let my opponent know he had hurt me, even remotely. The truth of the matter is that it usually hurt a lot, but I resolved to hide that fact from my face. I did not flinch. I did not wince. I did not allow my hands or fingers to shake or tremble. They would give me everything they had, and I would just smile at them.

It was deflating. None of the other guys could believe I as willing to go as long as I did. They'd say things like, "Come on, man! You know that hurt!" and "Dude, just quit already!"

But I didn't. I never quit.

Eventually it got to the point where no one would play with me anymore. It wasn't fun for them. I never lost, and everyone was afraid to look silly playing against me.

Why do I bring that up?

As stupid as it may sound, that game (and games like it) taught me something. I learned to accept the pain as a reality, push through, and then give back more than I'd received. It's Jedi Mind Trick that got me through jobs I hated, situations that scared me, and conversations I would have preferred to have avoided.

It's an ability I've relied heavily upon within the past year.

I bought my first house. I moved almost an hour away from the area where I'd spent the previous 18 years of my life (and where my family still lives). I lost my job. Kim got pregnant. She lost her job (or, rather, we decided for her to give it up). I started my own business. It started off great, but then it hit a huge drought that had me awake on many sleepless nights wondering what we were going to do.

And now? We're on several different kinds of government assistance. We're behind on some of our bills. Chiefly, we're behind on our mortgage, and there's a possibility we'll lose our house (though I believe strongly that the Lord is not going to allow that to happen).

I pursued a dream. I jumped out of the airplane without even knowing if the parachute would work. I held out my hands and LIFE flicked me in the knuckles a hard as it could.

And I'm still standing.

I'm not telling you all of this so you'll feel sorry for me. I'm not telling you this so you'll think I'm awesome or noble.

You might think I'm brave or exceptionally strong, but I promise you, I'm not any braver or stronger than YOU are capable of being.

That's the point.

Following a dream is hard. Some days, it straight up SUCKS! But it can be done. I'm living proof that it can be done, and that you can accomplish more than you think you can.

My graphic design business is coming around. Slowly but surely. I also have picked up a part-time graphics gig with my church.

We're getting there. But we never would have if we'd flinched. If we had quit, we'd never know what it felt like to get to the finish line.

In some ways, I'm not sure we ever will get there. I think it's going to be a lifelong journey that is difficult. Difficult -- but worth it.

So don't quit. Don't give up. If you were called to something, chase after it with everything you have. It's why you were put here, and someone is watching you who needs to be inspired.


What dream are you chasing? 

Sometimes, You Just Need to Shut Up

For months, I had little to no work as a freelance graphic artist. There were days when I thought it would never turn around, and I'd need to pick up a pizza delivery job, just to be able to make ends meet.

Things are still pretty tight, but within the past few weeks, business has picked up tremendously. It's been really good.

Then, this weekend, I had an issue with a client. I won't go into details, but it had to do with a check written and the way the client wanted to handle straightening things out.

I was really flustered by the whole thing, and I took to Facebook to vent and get feedback from friends (particularly my fellow freelancers), regarding how they thought I should respond.

The response was loud and clear.

Though they were all very kind and diplomatic with their words of wisdom, the prevailing commentary was essentially a reminder that I should be grateful for having work at all, and that I needed to extend extra grace to the client.

They weren't wrong, and it wasn't rocket science. I guess I just needed to hear it.

It's just remarkable to me that I even did need to hear it, you know? Why can't I be grateful for what I have? Why can't I just grin and bear it and extend grace when people do things that don't merit such a response?

I'm a slow learner, but I'm thankful that God does extend that extra grace to me.

Sometimes, you need to ask for wisdom. Sometimes, you need to surround yourself by friends who care enough to speak truth into your life. Sometimes, you need to slow down and not act hastily.

Sometimes, you just need to shut up.

Top 5 Things Freelancers Want You to Know

This past summer, I made the stupid idiotic foolish daring move to start my own web design business from home. 

It was a decision born out of necessity, as I had been laid off from my teaching job, and we were also expecting a baby, so it allowed me the opportunity to be at home and help my wife.

It's been a rough ride. Most of the people I've worked with have been awesome. I've made some friends and met some really cool clients in the process.

However, I've also come across some not-so-spectacular human beings, and I've had to bite my tongue on more than one occasion.

But, I realized the other day, these people just don't know. They're not jerks on purpose. They're just ignorant.

I don't want you to be ignorant, so I decided to develop a list of things that freelancers, such as myself, which you knew.

Here they are:

It's Never Stupid to Dream: So Don't Stop Doing It

A couple of months ago, Kim and I made a very difficult decision.

I'd just been laid off from my teaching job. We had a baby on the way. We had a mortgage payment to make every month.

Kim worked, but she hated her job, and I hated that she hated it. I wished she could quit. So did she. Kim has always wanted to be a stay-at-home mom. I wanted that too, but it always felt so far away.

Our dream scenario was one where I could work for myself at home and be able to make enough money in that endeavor, so that Kim could stay home and be able to focus on being a mom.

So, against popular opinion, we did something bold and decided that I would start a graphic design business out of our home, and Kim would just focus on mothering. She would quit her job, and I would design websites.

For the first two months, things were going great. I was still getting paychecks from teaching, because I was paid on a twelve-months schedule. We had a pretty decent amount in savings. To boot, I was getting graphic work, left and right. It seemed like it would continue forever.

But then it didn't.

I Have a Job. Thanks for Asking.

Photo via Creative Commons user hufse

In March, I was informed that I was not going to be extended a contract for the upcoming year, due to low-enrollment.

Since that point, I've polished up the old resume. I applied for countless jobs. I've made calls. I've sent e-mails. I've stressed. I've worried.

I very nearly fell apart.

During all of it, nothing ever seemed to come together. I received no positive feedback. Every time I thought I had something positive, it ended up being just another false alarm and a disappointment.

So I gave up, and that's when things started to turn around.

When Life Karate Kicks You in the Face: Vol. 4

Photo by Flickr user Teuobk

Over the past few weeks, I've been letting you guys behind the curtain of my life, so to speak, with a series of posts called When Life Karate Kick You in the Face. If you need to get caught up on the first three volumes, click HERE.

The short synopsis is this:

- I was laid off from my job of six years.
- My wife is 30-plus weeks pregnant.
- My wife recently quit her job.

That's about the shape of things.

To this point, I've been positive. I've tried to share motivational words and blog posts that will encourage you if you are or ever find yourself in a similar position. But encouraging words only go so far. Eventually, you need to come up with a gameplan:

When Life Karate Kicks You in the Face: Vol. 3

Photo by Flickr user ColKorn1982

Last week, I started a series of posts titled, "When Life Karate Kicks You in the Face." If you need to get caught up, you can check out the first two posts in the series HERE.

The short version is that I was laid off from my job recently. Additionally, I have a very pregnant wife and we just bought a house several months ago.

As if that wasn't enough, we had to make a very difficult and stressful decision last week. It's a decision that I believe will lead to ultimate happiness, but that road is probably going to bring us through a tumultuous valley.

When Life Karate Kicks You in the Face: Vol. II

I don't know what preceded professional wrestler Ric Flair being kicked in the face, in the above picture, by Hulk Hogan.

What I do know, is that Flair, almost undoubtedly, got back up off the mat in an overtly dramatic fashion, let out a loud: "Whooooooo!", to the delight of the crowd onhand, and then got back into the fight.

That's what Ric Flair did. He was one of "The Four Horsemen." He was an icon. When he got knocked down, he almost always got back up again.

I've never fought Hulk Hogan, but I did get knocked down recently.